Kawawa ka naman... ikaw kasi e!

Umagang-umaga nagpi-friendster ka. Me hinihintay ka bang "new friend request"? O baka naman message ang hinihintay mo? Di naman kaya umaasa kang titingnan nya ang profile mo, kaya panay ang tingin mo sa "who's viewed me"? Asa ka pa!

Teka, bakit mo ba sya hinihintay? Me usapan ba kayo? Nagkita ba kayo lately tapos sinabihan mo syang i-invite ka nya sa friendster? Hindi naman di ba? In fact, hindi ka nga sigurado kung naaalala ka pa nya, o kung masaya ba sya pag naaalala ka nya.

Wala ka ng choice, at naiinip ka na rin. So this is it. Feeling mo kailangan mo gawin to. Nagdadalawang-isip ka pa kc makikita ka nya sa "who's viewed me". Kunwari ka pa! Gusto mo naman e. Gusto mong magparamdam. Gusto mong malaman nya na buhay ka pa.

Hinanap mo sya... pero hindi mo makita. Asan na kaya sya? Naku... baka simula nung nawala ka hindi na rin sya nag-friendster. GANUN? So importante ka pa rin sa kanya? E bakit wala na sya?

Next step. Tiningnan mo ang friendster ng mga kaibigan nya. Sa wakas, me napala ka rin... un nga lang.

Kawawa ka naman... Sa picture mo na lang sya nakikita ngayon, at kailangan mo makuntento dahil wala ng ibang paraan. Buti na lang pwede ng maraming pictures sa friendster ngayon... at buti na lang kahit paano e naeextra sya sa mga pictures ng barkada nya.

Kawawa ka naman... hanggang tingin ka na lang. Samantalang dati ang lapit nya. Feeling mo naman ganun ka kaganda para hindi nya magawang iwan ka. Asan ka ngayon?

Kawawa ka naman... tinitingnan mo syang nakangiti kasama ng ibang tao. Ang saya-saya. Ganyan din sya ngumiti noon pag kasama ka nya.

Kawawa ka naman... dati kahit anong oras mo sya kailanganin hindi ka nagdadalawang-salita. Ngayon nagtyatyaga kang i-save lahat ng pictures nya para lang kahit paano makita mo sya lagi.

Kawawa ka naman... dati kasa-kasama mo sya. Pakiramdam mo me mali sa mga pictures na tinitingnan mo. Parang dapat ikaw ang katabi nya. Ginawan mo ngayon ng paraan... itinabi mo ung picture mo sa picture nyang dinekwat mo sa friendster.

Eew! Dapat ka na bang tawaging desperada? Hindi naman siguro. Baka mas dapat kang tawaging TANGA!

Baket?

Ikaw kasi e... Minahal ka nya. Sabi nya he never knew about love till he found you. Alam mong totoo un dahil ikaw ang unang minahal nya... pero ikaw rin ang unang nanakit sa kanya.

Ikaw kasi e... Sumuko ka. Isang away-bata lang sumuko ka na agad. Sabagay, bata pa kayo nun. Pero alam mong pwede mo pang bawiin nung nakita mo syang umiiyak at humihingi ng tawad. Pero matigas ang ulo mo.

Ikaw kasi e... Mainipin ka. Minadali mo ang lahat. Minadali mong tuparin nya ung pangako nyang magiging kayo ulet. At nung di ka makahintay, humanap ka ng iba. Me nahanap ka ba? Siguro meron... marami. Ang tanong: meron bang kahit isang pumalit sa kanya? Aba ewan ko! Basta ang alam ko hanggang ngayon hindi ka pa rin masaya.

Ikaw kasi e... Hindi ka nagtiwala. Ilang beses syang lumapit sa 'yo. Lagi syang nasa tabi mo, naghihintay na sya naman ang mapansin mo. Ready na sya e. Pero hindi mo sya tinanggap dahil natatakot kang ikaw naman ang iwan nya. Ang tanga mo! Tingin mo magtyatyaga sya ng ganun katagal para lang lokohin ka. Tsk, tsk, tsk... illogical.

Ikaw kasi e...

Yan tuloy, sumuko sya. Napagod sya. Humanap sya ng iba. Malas mo, nakakita sya.

Pero hindi pa rin un e. Alam mong me pag-asa pa, pero dahil lang nasaktan ka nung nalaman mong me nakita na sya, lumayo ka ulet. Pagmamahal? Pagpaparaya? NO! Pride ang tawag jan. Alam mo namang ikaw pa rin ang pipiliin nya, hindi ka man lang lumaban at naghintay. Lumayo ka dahil pakiramdam mo niloko ka nya. Paano naman ung ilang taong pinaasa mo sya?

Huli na nung ma-realize mo... last chance na pala ung pinalampas mo.

Ngayon wala na sya. Hindi mo alam kung paano sya hahanapin. Di mo rin alam kung hinihintay ka nya. Hindi mo matanggap na posibleng me iba na talaga sya. Pero kailangan mo tanggapin... the same way na tinanggap nya ng maraming beses na me iba ka na.

Ngayon naiiyak ka. Di mo rin kasi matanggap na totoo lahat ng sinasabi ko. Pero pinipigil mo pa rin ang luha mo, kasi hindi mo sigurado kung me karapatan kang umiyak. Ikaw ang me gusto nito. Bakit ka iiyak?

Sabi nila masakit daw magpakatanga sa taong mahal na mahal mo pero hindi ka naman mahal. Pero sa nakikita ko, mas masakit ata ung minahal ka nung tao, pero naging tanga ka at pinabayaan mo sya. Paano ko nasabi? E nagkakaganyan ka e!

Kawawa ka naman... Ikaw kasi e!

Ang Ating Musika

Last Saturday, November 9, 2007, I watched "Ang Ating Musika", a minor concert of no less than my idol, Regine Velasquez, at the Aliw Theatre. I was with Emerson, my bf. It started at around 9:30. Fortunately, we were able to reserve seats at Row I (patron).

Before the show started, the national anthem was sung by someone from the background. I think it was Kyla. The concert was jumpstarted by a medley of "Kayganda ng Ating Musika", another song which I am not familiar with, and "Limang Dipang Tao". Regine came in her very elegant white gown, riding a tricycle! Cool!

She sung only OPM songs. She had her rendition of songs by Willy Cruz, Ryan Cayabyab, Odette Quesada, Gary V, Freddie Aguilar, Jose Mari Chan, and many others. As expected, she delivered all the songs very well. Regine never fails to stun her audience. Her guests were also good. They had Jed Madela, PPS girls, and my second favorite, Kyla. While watching the show, I realized that I am an OPM-lover. I know almost all the songs, and I'm proud of it. Shame on those Filipinos who find OPM songs "baduy". Filipinos are great in music! We have countless great songs that we can be proud of.
This is not the best Regine concert that I have watched. Well, it's just a minor concert. The best for me is still R2K. But this is soo good! And what made it special? Well... I GOT HOLD OF REGINE'S HAND FOR ABOUT 2 SECONDS!!!!

Call me "corny", "mababaw" or anything, but this means so much to me as a die-hard fan. I am a regine fanatic. She has been my idol, my favorite, my inspiration, since I was a kid. I grew up singing her songs. I strived to develop my voice because I wanted to sing her songs. I wanted to be like her. She practically helped me nourish my talent, even if she is not aware of it. And up to now, no one still compares to her. Her songs keep me company whenever I am sad, whenever I am angry.... and just whenever I want to. So this moment is so precious to me.

Here's how it happened.

After she sang what everyone thought to be her last song, people approached the stage because ogie was there. I also went there for a chance to have a shot with ogie. I don't like him but I felt that it was the next best thing because regine was already at the backstage. And then... woohoo!!! Regine reappeared and sang a couple of dance songs. I went further till I reached the stage... and then wow! I was able to shake hands with her. OMG! I can't explain the feeling. All I know is that I am happy... but I guess this is more than happiness.

I am a Regine fanatic... and I will always be. I LOVE YOU SONGBIRD!!!!

I did the right thing...

I am sitting at the farthest seat... seeing him from afar. I don't know what kind of emotion dwells inside me. How would you call a feeling which is a mix of failure and success, of regret and triumph, of having lost and having found? Whatever it is, it lingers all over me, travelling through my veins, giving me that cold, uneasy feeling inside.

I met him in this very same place. We were singing, while he was playing the keyboards, teaching us. During breaktimes he would share stories with us, laugh with us, and sometimes just sat there with us. I loved laughing at his jokes. I loved listening to whatever he said. Moments with him were never boring... He has this aura and tone that will make you want to always listen to him.

There are many things to like about him.... but I liked it most when he would play the keyboards from his heart. He puts his soul into his music. Every sound he produces from those ebony and ivory keys is an expression of his inner self. But not everyone noticed it the way I did... that's why no one but me looked at him so deeply. No one but me listened to his music so eagerly.

Later, he made me understand why I loved his music. Not only could I relate to it... It speaks of me. His notes, his words, his movements, everything I saw and liked about him, was all about me. He loved me... He loved me so much and it was the only way he could let his feelings out. His songs spoke of hope, pain and confusion... Hope that someday we could be together. Pain because to have me he had to make a great sacrifice. Confusion because he didn't know if it was right to make such a sacrifice so we could be together.

He didn't tell me at first. But the power of his music reached my soul... Suddenly, I found my soul singing with him. I felt so connected to him. I found myself in love with him...

His plans changed. He used to be so determined to achieve his dream, but he decided to abandon his lifelong dream for me. He made that sacrifice of choosing me over the One who chose him. Then he had me.

At first it was a perfect relationship. He was my perfect guy and I was his perfect girl. Never was there a day when he didn't make me feel special. Even if we were so apart, he never failed to make me feel his love for me. It wasn't everyday that we communicated. In fact we seldom did. Perhaps it was the innate connection that made everything possible despite the distance and the odds. And in those very few stolen moments, we filled each minute with love so that our hearts would have something special to cherish.... until we could steal another moment for the two of us.

But reality is always there to wake us from our deep slumber. I fooled myself into thinking that we were building our dreams together, that I was really the one for him, that he belonged to my world, and that everything was just a preparation for my coming into his life. But everytime I looked at him, all I saw were still pain and confusion. I wasn't building his dream, I was destroying it. He does not belong to my world, because he was called for something more important. Everything did not happen in preparation for my coming into his life... The truth is, I was brought into his life to test the strength of his heart. I was a test that became a roadblock.

Then everything changed. It had to go back to its place, to where everything was before I came. He kept on telling me that he wanted to stay, that he didn't want to go back. But I felt fear in his words. Inside him was something different. I knew the Voice was so strong, and it is only his love for me that hindered him. He was so weak to do it, so I had to be strong for him. I had to be the one to decide. I did. I put an end to the two of us.

I saw him break down and cry. I heard him ask countless questions, and I saw him break down even more when he seemed to find no answer. I wanted to still be there for him, but I kept my distance because I knew that it was the right thing to do... and to still be with him even as a friend would make forgetting even more difficult for him. I had to go, and my leaving had to be as abrupt and as painful as I can. I wanted him to get hurt so that he could give up on romantic love and start to hate it. I wanted him to get mad at me so that it would be easier for him to let go and move on.

I went on with my life. At the start it was so difficult. But knowing that I did the right thing made it easier for me to deal with everything. Eventually, I bounced back to the wide world of mine, and became happy in it. There were still times when I think about him and what could have happened if I didn't end it. Would we still be together? Would he end up with another girl? Or would he be the one to break up to go on with his dream, and leave me in tears? But hearing news about him erased all those questions in my head. He did great in his journey... and he was just a few steps away from finally getting there. A few people who know about our past sometimes told me that he missed me, and that he still loved me. But I never dwelt on that thought. It would only bring back the pain, coupled with regret in the idea that I didn't make the right choice.

Now I'm still here in my place... Still seeing him from afar. He is there... at the altar, in white... raising the Holy Bread and Wine. He did it. He realized his plans, reached his dreams, and followed the Voice inside his heart. He is now a priest, and I am attending the Holy Mass that he celebrates. There used to be just him and me. Now, it is him, me, the other parishioners, and God. The mixed emotions I felt turned into feelings of pride, happiness and fulfillment. My sacrifice was paid off. His pain and tears were worth it. Finally...

As I stare into the image of Jesus Christ on the Cross behind him, I close my eyes and say a prayer to God, thanking Him for guiding us into the right track, for making me an instrument in strengthening his vocation, and for making everything all right. Then I open my eyes...and seeing him again, I tap my own shoulder and tell myself... I did the right thing.

So sick...

Lately, I've been feeling so sick. I can't focus on my work. I can't find fulfillment in what I am doing. Fulfillment is something I have been struggling to find in this workplace. I used to think that finally being in the position that I am in is but one step below the peak of an accountant's career... this used to be my dream, or at least this is next to my ultimate dream. Dreams do come true... it did... and it happened so fast... so early.

But this is not the way I imagined it to be. The reality behind the prestige is a multitude of disappointments and frustrations. I was welcomed in the corporate world by competent persons, got exposed to challenges and competitions, and was very happy about it. I yearned for more... and it was given to me. But it came to me as a big surprise when when I looked around and found that no one is beside me. No one is there to lift me up, or at least give me a good fight so I could lift myself up. I thought I was climbing up, but then I came to realize that the road I'm walking on is flat and deserted. I went on, believing that somewhere ahead, another mountain would be there for me to climb. But instead.... I reached the dead end. I am going nowhere. What's next? Nothing.

Now I'm moving out. I have to take a few steps back to be able to get out of this dead end. I will return to the crossroads where I had already been, but this time, to choose another new path... Once again I will learn how to conform... then carve my own niche... and make a difference. I will have to go through what I call the "normal process", wherein everything shall happen gradually, and not as steadfast as the way things happened to me here. I will learn the movements step-by-step, and I will learn it with my heart, so that I could dance gracefully...

I really don't know how to wrap up these thoughts. Perhaps this is meant to be left this way... because this is not meant to be ended. It is a continuation of my pursuits for the realization of my dreams... I will walk through a new road with God beside me... and I will make it. I can make a difference...

Birthday Party...the JOLOGZ way

Lifted from my friendster blog...

July 26, 2006 is written on my calendar using bold red ink and highlighted with neon yellow, not because I would get to meet Regine Velasquez in person or have a free makeover from Ricky Reyes’ own hands, but because I would be having an advanced celebration of my birthday. It is not unusual to celebrate one’s birthday (of course! Duh?!). In all 22 years of my life, my birthdays were always made special by my family and friends. But this time, it felt different because I would not be the only one celebrating the Big Day. We planned for a triple birthday bash for me and two of my closest friends, Tutuy and Mama Su. This is the very first time JOLOGZ would be experiencing this kind of celebration, which made me very excited… to the 3rd degree!

It started when Tutuy told us that he wanted to have his party at our house. Mama Su and I decided to join…. so we could spend less. Hahaha! But it turned out to be not only a cost-saving scheme, but a “fun-enhancing” idea. (I would not think of it as time-saving because it is never a waste of time to plan for parties with your friends.)

With the help of our friends (special thanks to Tiya Weng), we came up with a menu that cost us a humble amount of 500 bucks each. I remember the years when spending such amount is a huge pain in the ass. But now that we are already professionals… hah! Piece of bubble gum! (yabang!)

Who would want to wake up early on a cold morning for general cleaning? Me! Hehehe… On that red-letter day, we cleaned our apartment unit as if the US President would be coming. Very tiring it was! We sanitized the areas which were left dusty and dirty since forever… but we didn’t mind the achooos!, yucks! and eewws! because we wanted our place to be ready for the party. When it was finally done…. Whew! You should have seen how organized our room was… costing us only 56 bucks each for cleaning materials! (By the way, as of this writing, it already got back to its old messy appearance. Hehehe…)
 
It’s party time! The event was graced by the most special persons in the world, next to our family….JOLOGZ! We had a simple dinner of spaghetti, pansit malabon and barbeque. We also had pizza from Mama Su and cake from Tutuy. What was my share? Hah! Red wine and brandy, as per Tutuy’s request. FYI: JOLOGZ don’t usually drink… but we thought it’s good to try once.

After dinner, we indulged into the stuff that bonded us in the first place….SINGING! Thanks to my new credit card, I was able to buy a dvd-videoke player so we no longer need to go to ktv bars and splurge our cash just to sing. It was rockin’ fun! We belted a few serious songs, and jammed on lots of funny songs. We danced like disco rats and laughed till our jaws dropped.

Finally, we came to the serious part of the event… open forum. I think this is the secret ingredient of our friendship. We are always in touch with each other’s emotions, and I mean deep emotions. We do not think it’s shameful to reveal secrets which others may find scandalous. We find comfort in sharing our lives with each other… and we take pride in being each other’s confidant. Our sharing is, well… reserved for us and will be kept to ourselves for eternity.

As we were about to sleep, I whispered a short prayer, thanking the Almighty for this wonderful day, and wishing for more moments like this to come. I will never forget this day, for it was when I have proven to myself once again that TROPANG JOLOGZ is still alive no matter how busy we all are… no matter where are paths would lead us.

While You Are Sleeping

This is a song written out of love...

I wanted to tell you
How I love those eyes that stare at me with love
I wanna let you know
You’re the greatest gift someone like me could have
I melt inside when you smile at me
And when you hold my hand, I know
Forever you will be with me…

But I tremble when I try to speak
And I don’t know how to start
There’s only one way I could tell you
What’s inside my heart

While you are lying beside me tonight
I’ll whisper those words while holding you tight
I’ll be watching over you
While painting your face in my heart
That knows no other love but you
When you wake up tomorrow
I’ll still be with you
I’ll be waiting for another night
And while you’re sleeping
I’ll tell it all to you over again…

I wonder if you
Could hear my voice and see me in your dreams
I hope you could feel my love
As I wrap you in my warm and sweet embrace
I am yours and you are for me
And until the end of time, I know
Together we will always be…

I will love you forever
The best way I know how
There are just things I’d like you to know
And I wanna say them now

So while you are lying beside me tonight
I’ll whisper those words while holding you tight
I’ll be watching over you
While painting your face in my heart
That knows no other love but you
When you wake up tomorrow
I’ll still be with you
I’ll be waiting for another night
And while you’re sleeping
I’ll tell it all to you over again…

Don't Tell Them It's Over

Once, a friend of mine opened up to me and shared her PATHETIC love story. I cried with her... and my emotions and feeling of sympathy moved me to write this song...

So, you’ll go
Telling me that leaving is the right thing to do
You want me to let go
But that’s one thing I can’t do
Coz in my heart it’s always you

I can’t go on
It’s so hard to understand what went wrong
But if there’s no other way
I can ever make you stay
Then I’ll have to see you walk away

Refrain:
Before you break my heart and go
There’s one thing I’m asking from you….

Chorus:
Please don’t tell them that it’s over
Let’s pretend that we are still together
I never want them to see
The pain inside of me
Honey, it won’t take long
Coz soon you will be back into my arms
Where you belong

If they know a thing
They’d come to see the pain that I am feeling
And when they look into my eyes
I’ll only get to realize
That you’re no longer by my side

Oh, I know
The ones who care for us would be hurting, too
Spare them from the pain
Alone, I’ll cry in the rain
Don’t let them see it’s killing me

Refrain:
They would tell me to let go
But I still find it hard to do, so…

(Chorus)

Bridge:
I still wanna face each day believing
That you are still with me
Let me fool myself and live with lies
Oh please, just let it be
The only way I can live my life
Is to spend it loving you
I never want them all to know
I’m just too weak to let go
I can’t let go…

(Chorus)

Where you belong…
Please don’t tell them that we’re through
Till I can finally let you go…

Move on!

Written during my review for the CPA board (if my memory serves me right)...

Here I am again, playing with the keys of my computer, trying to think of the right words to define what’s in my mind. I’m staring at the screen, hoping that the answers to all my questions would just come out. But all I see is a blank sheet, waiting for me to put something in it. And inside me is nothing but abstract thoughts...

Minutes went on, and those shattered pieces of my ideas began to form a vivid image of the man I’m trying so hard not to think of, but is insisting to stay in my head. That man is you. So I realized that it isn’t my brain, but my heart, that speaks within me. My mind knows who I should think of, and it’s certainly not you, for reasons we both know. It is my heart that doesn’t welcome any reason. It only feels for you.

That budding feeling inside me has grown into its full blossom. You used to be on my mind in my quiet moments. But now, I think of you in even the noisiest time of the day. I no longer miss you in solitude, for in those moments, I just close my eyes and I’m with you. Taking a glimpse of your smile in your photograph is enough to keep me going whenever I feel like giving up. I finally found the perfect words to define this feeling. What else could this be, but Love?

If this is just a dream, then this is the most wonderful dream I ever had. So please don’t wake me up yet. I’m not yet ready to see beyond this fantasy. You might not be there when I wake up. Spare me this moment to experience how it is to be loved by you. Give me this chance to know you better, to set the dove in my heart free. Perhaps, by going through this dream, I could have the strength to step back to reality, and find the one who’s really meant for me. If it would be you, then nothing could be more wonderful than to live my dream. But if not, memories of you should be enough for me to go on.

Forgive me for not being brave enough to fight for my feelings. I can’t trade my future for this short moment of bliss. I’m still unsure where my real happiness is. If it’s in you, please show me. If you’re the right one, please fight for me, and if you would win, please take care of me. To regret is the last thing I would ever want to do.

I don’t know where tomorrow will lead me. So if this is my last chance, I opt to take it. I’d rather tell you how I feel at this very moment, than be sorry for myself if this chance would not come again.

I LOVE YOU.

I'm Learning My Lesson

I wrote this when I was in college...

One of Life’s greatest lessons has been delivered to me. It didn’t require me to enroll in any university…no homework, recitations, projects and quizzes. I wish it could be that easy, but I have to learn it the hard way. I am the student, Life is my professor, Love is the subject, and the most effective tool that Life is using for me… is pain. I have to take down my notes on the blank sheets in my heart using the sharpest pen, and every stroke hurts me. Memories, regrets, broken hopes and shattered dreams are all engraved in my heart.

Years ago, I met a boy who brought music into my quiet world. My little universe turned into the brightest galaxy. We knew it was true love, I mean, what else could it be? We started to share each other’s dreams and build castles in the air. But because we were both young and impulsive, a single, petty quarrel ended our fairy tale…

…So I thought.

Our relationship ended, but not our story. We promised to wait for each other until we get ready for a lifetime commitment. But I easily gave up and started searching for my own happiness away from him. I had been trying to look for what I think I deserve, but at the deepest part of my heart, it has always been him. I learned to appreciate, and love, the other guys that came into my life, but everytime I’d step out of a relationship, his company would be my resting place. That could mean nothing but love. He waited for me with such great patience, endured every strand of pain I caused him, embraced me with open arms whenever I’d run into him, and selflessly gave me freedom when another man would take me away from him.

Recently, I decided to finally set my hidden feelings free. He was there, sharing few but precious moments with me. Once again, I got the chance to experience that different kind of happiness that only my One True Love can give. Everything happened so fast, and if action truly speaks louder than words, I would say that we were already having our second chance. He told me that he is already a changed man, that he loved me, and that he wanted me back. I never gave him any direct answer, but I showed him just what it is. I still love him… I have always loved him… and I love him beyond what any word can define.

Just when I thought everything was already in its proper place, the bitter truth was revealed to me. There is already another girl in his life. He got tired of waiting for me. The whole time I thought that he was holding on, he was actually letting go. I felt so helpless; I could do nothing but cry for the death of my dreams. I didn’t get the license to get mad at him. In fact, I understand. I kept him hanging for so long, and it’s perfectly natural for him to give up. It’s just so sad that he had to go for me to realize how much I love him, and what he really means to me.

People tell me to let him go, and just choose someone else who would be willing to do anything for me. I have always been in control, but this time, I’m too powerless. How will I forget him when everytime I try, my mind takes me back to the times when he told me that he loved me with all sincerity? I can only recall our happy memories, for if there are sad ones, I have forgotten about them. I’m holding on, believing that everything he told me was true. He may already belong to someone else, but it doesn’t stop me from hoping that inside of him, it’s still me.

Truly, there are many options available for me, but because I love him, I’m choosing him. Who cares if I’m being stupid? I’m not losing hope that perhaps, it’s just one of the many challenges I need to face before I could spend the rest of my life with him. My world has always been so bright, so maybe I need some darkness to better appreciate the light he is giving me. He had done great sacrifices for me, so why not do the same for him? He had waited for me, and I guess it’s time for me to pay him back.

Every second of waiting kills me, but no matter how painful it is, I still find happiness in every tear that I shed for him. Someday, my tears would create a river going to the ocean where he is…then he would be sailing back to me.

Love entered my life and gave me so much happiness, but because I didn’t handle it with utmost care, it slipped off my grasp and flew away. Now, I’m learning my lesson. When true love comes along, hold it with both hands. Never hesitate to show the person you love how much he means to you. Tomorrow might be too late. Life showed me that time can change everything. There is never an assurance that when a person loved you once, he will be yours forever.

I don’t know if he would still come back to me, but I won’t force myself to forget him when I really can’t. I know that someday, our paths will meet again. The love that he felt for me before is the same love that will bring him back to me. I’ll keep on waiting for as long as I love him. I owe it to him… I owe it to myself.