About Me

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Because I am blessed, I am blessing the world in Jesus' name...

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Stepping into reality...


It's not the usual short love story that I used to write... In fact, I am... I have to... say goodbye to it. I was able to write those stories because I had time for literary works, movies, TV and, most of all, friends who fed me with their own stories.

I must admit that things have radically changed. No more of those stuff I used to be into. Law school changed me. Not only did it put me into reading my thick books and carrying them all the time... but it fed me with real stories. With that, I mean the countless cases that I read... Ok, include the juicy stories about people in the campus (professors, in particular. hehe...) in the count.

I came to write this stuff because I have been trying to write stories the way I used to do. But when I visited this blog today, I found many drafts... like lonely hearts waiting to live happily ever after. Instead of leaving them all hanging, I decided to put an end to their waiting. I deleted all those unfinished work.

Now, it's all reality... But at least it will now be all about me... plain and simple. Not that I despise myself for studying law... I just miss what I used to do. But the thrill and excitement of my life as a law student, and the anticipation of passing the bar and savoring the prestige of the legal profession, just outweigh all the longing.

Join me as I venture into blogging in a different way...

When I become a lawyer... I'll see if my clients' stories would be able to inspire me to write again... without disclosing their identity, of course. I know what I'd be liable for.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Letting go...


Today, the battle ends…
But no one emerges with victory.
All are wounded… all are in pain.
Everybody gets hurt in order to be right.


I shall stop fighting against myself
For you… the very reason for the fight…
The very weapon in my hands…
Is not mine to use…
Is never mine to keep.


You…
A spirit as tranquil as the lush green plains…
Like a precious diamond you sparkle…
So pure… so perfect…
How could you be so real?


Who am I to have you?
Who am I to hold you?


I…
The sun at mid day that dries up the lush green plains…
The dust that tarnishes the diamond…
So broken and shattered…
So real…


You’ve given me strength…
And letting go weakens me inside
Tearing me into pieces…


You wanted to keep me…
But as your grip tightens… your hands begin to bleed…
Yet you still hold me with your loving arms…
It hurts me even more…


So today I am letting go…
Not because I don’t love you…
But because I care…
I care for you so much…
So much more than I ever care for myself.


Not that you are not enough for me…
But because I will never be enough for you…
The love that you can give…
Is never mine to receive…
You need more… and I can never give you more…
I have nothing more to give…
Because I’m nothing.


Fly away to where you belong…
For this lonely heart is not your home…
Hell is not meant for angels to dwell…


I shall watch you from afar
As I pick up the shattered pieces of myself.
That’s how the universe must be
Balanced… in harmony.


You are a beautiful melody…
But not if you’re with me.


Be the most beautiful song that I never could sing…
The most beautiful star I could never wish on…
The most beautiful dream I could never realize.